A Little Bit of Both

I ran 10 miles today.  I hated it.  Then I loved it.

Let me ‘splain…

I hated it because:

  • It was cold.  (But in all fairness I would have hated it if it was hot, too.)
  • It was windy.  And not just a little bit windy.  And I swear to God, it didn’t matter if I was running north, south, east, or west, I was running INTO the wind.  How the hell does that work?
  • My out-and-back was uphill both ways.  Again with the defying physics!
  • I was hungry.  I got up and ate a Clif bar for breakfast at 7:00 with all intentions of heading right out to run.  Well, I loafed around and didn’t start until 10:00.  I should have eaten a little something else before I left, but I didn’t, and my stomach was growling by mile 2.
  • The GU I ate, took, sucked down (I never know what verb to use with GU-related activities!) at mile 5 gave me a hellacious stomach cramp.  It lasted forever and forced me to walk 0.2 of a mile at mile 7.  It finally went away.

I loved it because:

  • It burned off the fistfuls of Reese’s Pieces I ate at the movies last night.  (We saw The Adjustment Bureau–great movie!)
  • Even though I was for the most part ignoring my Garmin, despite the wind, and even including that short walk break, I finished with a pace faster than expected:  10:38 (stop laughing), a 10-mile training personal best.
  • It showed me that if I get lucky and the stars align and I have good running conditions at my half next month, I just might really be able to pull off the time goal that I’ve had floating around in my head.

Highs and Lows

High – Going to FL.
Low – Getting a phone call from mother-in-law the Thursday we were in FL with some very shocking news.
High – Long run in FL of 11 miles at 11:05 pace.
Low – Chafing between my ass cheeks during that run.
Low – Coming home.
High – Seeing my critters.
Low – Finding out more details on the shocking news that my MIL called about.
High – Memorial Day with the family.
Low – Father-in-law lost his job after 41 years with the same company.
Lower than low – Realizing (again) that people are evil.  They will do or say anything if they think they have something to gain from it, no matter how much of a LIE it is or how much it will make someone else suffer.
Even lower than that – Realizing how truly effed up our justice system is.  Innocent until proven guilty, my ass.
Low – Going back to work after 10 days away.
High – At least I have a job to go back to.
High – Set a new 3-mile PR.
High – Set a new 6-mile PR.
Low – Couldn’t hack it during my scheduled 13-mile long run today.  Cut it to 10 miles and walked the last two of those.  Stress?  Lack of sleep?  Dehydration?  81 and no shade?  Probably all of the above.
Low – Chafed arm pits.

I’m really struggling right now.  Not with the running.  Screw the running.  This was one bad day.  We all have them.  I ran strong during my midweek runs.  Next weekend will be better.  I’m struggling emotionally.  I hate seeing the people I love hurting.  I hate the fact that it’s so senseless.  I hate the fact that we live in such a litigious society.  I hate people that want something for nothing and will do whatever they can to try to get it.  I hate the fact that our judicial system caters to these people.  I hate the fact that I’m so weak that I’ve let these people get to me the way they have.  I hate that I’m struggling with my faith right now.  As a Christian, I know I’m supposed to pray for my enemies, and I hate that I’m not strong enough to do that.  Well, I’ve DONE it, but come on, this is God we’re talking about.  He knows I didn’t mean it.  He knows what I really feel in my heart, and He knows that it’s nothing but pure and raw hatred.

I keep telling myself, “God’ll get ’em.”  But how wrong is it that I want a front-row seat when he does?

Top 10 Reasons to Hate Spring Running

Misszippy has outlined her Top 10 reasons to love spring running.

Being the pessimist that I am, I feel it is my duty to counter her post with one of my own.

Top 10 Reasons to Hate Spring Running

1. Allergies. I sneeze, sniffle, and snort my way through the entire run. Although I must say my snot rocket accuracy has improved. I can now hit a moving target from 20 paces.

2. Bugs. Due to said allergies, I have to breathe through my mouth, inhaling more than my fair share of bugs. I hear they’re full of protein, but until they start making them in better flavors, I’d rather get my protein from peanut butter.

3. Road repair. Nothing like getting pelted with tiny-ass rocks being slung from the gravel truck as he flies past you. Seriously, TDOT. That pothole has been there since November. It won’t hurt you to slow down to 55mph. It’ll still be there when you get there. I promise.

4. Irresponsible dog owners. Warmer weather = more people in the park. More people in the park = more dogs in the park. More dogs in the park = more dog SHIT in the park. If you’re not gonna pick it up, at least kick it off the path. I’d rather not carry your dog’s digested kibble home on the soles of my Mizunos.

5. Tan lines. I hate tan lines, and I already have one in the shape of a Garmin Forerunner on my left wrist and a kickin’ sock line. Sexy, right? Especially with flip-flops.

6. Road kill. It was there in the winter, too, but at least it was frozen, keeping the aroma to a minimum. Now that it’s warm out, the pungent stinch of decomp lingers in the air.

7. Baseball season. Instead of being out there sweating and chaffing, I could (and would much rather) be sitting inside watching my Cardinals and drinking a cold beer. Or bloody mary, or margarita, or…you get the point.

8. It’s hot.

9. It’s humid.

10. It’s hot and humid.

(Lil Runner is hosting a CEP Compression sock giveaway!)

Maybe Next Year

In approximately half an hour, lots of people will be sitting at their computers registering for the Marine Corps Marathon.

After much arguing amongst the voices in my head, I will not be one of them.

I’m so disappointed in myself for not being any further along than I am. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I told myself that I would make the decision based on how I was doing when registration opened. Well, it’s opening today, and it’s just completely out of the question. It was 90 degrees here yesterday, and I STRUGGLED to get through five measley miles. It was better than last week, but still not good. The marathon is in October, so that would mean that I would be doing long runs in August and September–when 90 is considered “warm”. I just really and truly don’t believe I can hack it.

And I have to wonder if I ever will be able to. I’ve said all along that trying to train myself to be a runner is like trying to train my cat to be a dog.

What do you guys honestly think? I know lots of you have been very encouraging with all your “If I can, you can!” talk, and I really appreciate that. But I still wonder if that’s really true. If we’re all different on the outside, isn’t the same true for our muscles and hearts and lungs? Some people are predisposed to be awesome runners. I’m not that lucky. I may WANT to be a runner but I’m not. And training and will power can only change so much. I may WANT green eyes instead of blue, too, but I can’t will that to change either.